It’s that time of the year that everyone… hates.

For being the holiday that is all about the love, the feelings that surround Valentine’s Day tend to be a little (just a little) on the negative side.

It’s a common horror of mankind to be single and have to witness all the disgustingly happy couples littering all over your social media feeds with such long-winded and rambling posts of adoration that would make Shakespeare blush. Nothing can quite settle in that dead, frozen, unforgiving winter loneliness quite like seeing all your friends with partners increasing their PDA exponentially for just one day.

But, what if I could tell you there was a way to escape the cold, dead grip of loneliness this Valentine’s Day? Well, with Sam’s list of things that “she-says-she-doesn’t-do-every-Valentine’s-Day-but-totally-does”: you can kiss that crippling loneliness goodbye for just one day only! Let’s get into it.

• Netflix

Get ready to strap into the endless titles of the wonderful Netflix to the point where you don’t even have enough willpower to click on the next episode button and simply stare into the depths of your computer screen with the bright shining face of a cadaver.

• Make Memes

Unironic ironic Valentine’s Day Cards with memes so surreal that almost make you forget that you don’t have anyone to send them to but your friends? Check.

• Buy Yourself Chocolate

All the chocolate. You’re going to need it to self-medicate the loneliness away.

• Do Your Homework

Unlike the other things on this list, this one is actually funny.

• Watch Youtube Vine Videos

Wanna know what your love life and Vine have in common? They’re both dead.

And if all else fails this Valentine’s Day, you still have the joy of getting that one special snap from Team Snapchat on Valentine’s Day.