Jane Smith: Cresskill’s Coffee Caper

Art by Nola Yoon

With Cresskill High School in full swing, people are adjusting to their morning routine. Whether that is managing their timing or trying to get the most sleep possible, One thing is for certain: No morning coffees on the property!

Coffee is associated with mornings and tiredness, two things that high school students know of really well. With Dunkin Donuts less than a mile from the school, and Starbucks being 6only six minutes away it is inevitable that students will make a coffee run at some point in the school day. The shocking part is no matter the time of day for the dose of caffeine it is prohibited from entering the school building. 

In the past, CHS students were able to bring drinks back to school with no strings attached. It seems ever since the strict rules that came with Chodae they are hard to shake. Last spring when CHS transferred into Chodae school in Northvale for in person learning, there was a list of rules to follow while in a building that wasn’t our own. One of the infamous ones was only water permitted in the building(except for lunch). There could be no trace of coffee, snacks or even gum. Now that we are back to our territory it is unclear why these rules are still intact. Perhaps it is to keep the recently reconstructed school in good condition, or the school is stuck in their ways.

One thing is for certain though, the constant transitions CHS community has faced these past years have definitely done damage. It is not a shock that the adjustment to normalcy has been difficult but now dealing with the continuation of more limitations is the cherry on top of the past few years. 

Even with the existence of these strict rules, is it possible that rules can be bent if done correctly. Jane Smith is here to tell you how to successfully get your beverage in the building with no consequences.

Step 1: Purchase your drink.

Step 2: Make sure you have a drink stopper or something that can cover your straw/drinking hole in your bag.

Step 3: Place the drink in your backpack leaning against a book up straight.

Step 4: Walk slowly and delicately, being careful not to spill your beverage in your backpack.

Step 5: Keep a guilt free smile on your face as you enter the building.

Step 6: Once you have arrived in the safety of your classroom grab your drink from your bag.

Step 6: Enjoy! You made it!